A theater onstage play.

‘Almighty God, Jehovah, said unto Moses, “Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.” -----King Saul, the Jehovah--anointed first King of the Hebrews, said to his servants, “Seek me a woman who is a witch that I may go to her.” And King Saul said unto the witch, “What sawest thou?” The witch said unto Saul, “I saw gods ascending out of the earth!” ’ The Bible.

Characters:-
 
-A few nondescript noisy non-speaking Zombies.
-Jehovah, almighty God.
-Samuel. Very old prophet loyal to Jehovah.
-Saul. King of the Hebrews.
-Witch. Daughter. Adult. Zeldra.
-Witch. Mother.

(The onstage setting is inside the witch’s cauldron room. Part of the smoking bubbling cauldron is seen jutting out onto the stage at the edge of stage right. MOTHER enters hurriedly and confusedly, downstage-left. She pauses, stage-center, clearly undecided what to do. She carries a small container in her hand. ZELDRA enters downstage-left, casually struggling pushing a trolley on which there is a plaque.)

ZELDRA: Mom! What’s happening?

MOTHER: I’m not sure, Zeldra. Is the King coming here?

ZELDRA: King Saul, Mom? King of the Hebrews?

MOTHER: Yes!

ZELDRA: No, Mom. He is forbidden by his god, Jehovah. Everyone knows that. And because we live here far from his kingdom. Where do you want me to put this, Mom?

MOTHER: What is it?

ZELDRA: Mom! The names of all those almighty immortal Gods you tricked into falling forever mortal into our cauldron!

MOTHER: (Utterly disinterested.) Oh, that. Just stash it anywhere out of the way, for the time being. (ZELDRA pushes the trolley, and stands it out of the way, but where the audience can see it entirely.) I have this troubling feeling. (A loud pounding on the door upstage-left. They look wide-eyed at each other.)

ZELDRA: (Whispering in fear.) Cast a spell, Mom. Do not open it!

MOTHER: (Whispering.) It is the King, Zeldra. Our chance, at last, for at peace with him. You go. Hide. Arm yourself with spells and charms. (ZELDRA exits, downstage-left. MOTHER goes and opens the door upstage-left. SAUL, completely hidden by hood and cloak, unarmed, strides into the room. MOTHER, quickly steps aside, and bows slightly in respect. ) Your majesty. Welcome.

SAUL: (He stares at her in rigid silence for a few seconds before speaking.) You know who I am?
(She shrugs.)

MOTHER: Your majesty, I am a witch.

SAUL: The witch in charge of this place?

MOTHER: Yes, your majesty, this place far away from trespassing in your realm, your majesty. At your service. (He looks around taking a few steps. He removes his hood and cloak; she takes them from him and places them on a chair.

SAUL: Do you have a name?

MOTHER: Witch it is, your majesty, if your majesty is here to engage my professional services.

SAUL: I am.

MOTHER: Then it is safest you address me as witch, your majesty.

SAUL: You know I am here in disobedience against my god.

MOTHER: That would be Jehovah, your majesty.

SAUL: Yes.

MOTHER: Your majesty, we witches live in peace with all gods who allow us. With those like Jehovah, we allow their wishes and live far away from their realms and their followers.

SAUL: I am here only to talk to Samuel the prophet who served Jehovah and me flawlessly. Samuel died peacefully, but Jehovah does not answer my prayers now that there is no High Priest. My kingdom is at war under attack. I need help. I want you to call up Samuel that I might ask him to intercede with Jehovah on my behalf, for my kingdom. Please.

MOTHER: Your majesty, if there has to be a High Priest in order for God to hear us it might be better if your majesty accelerated the process of the selection of the next High Priest.

SAUL: Or you can find me another deity that will help me and my kingdom.

MOTHER: Your majesty, finding you another deity is easy; but if it will anger your Jehovah, only you will suffer because no almighty god can harm a witch who is outside their realm. Your majesty came here to call up Samuel; then let us do that.

SAUL: Do it, witch.

MOTHER: I will open the cauldron doors, your majesty. You call on Samuel, and stand aside. Only the ones called by name can stay until sent back, although others might break out and try to stay.

(She goes to the cauldron and throws her container in it. The smoking and bubbling explode into acceleration. The force from the cauldron throws SAUL against a wall. Noisy ZOMBIES catapult out of the cauldron and run about wildly before catapulting back, resisting, into the cauldron. SAUL, in much dignity, avoids contact with the ZOMBIES. MOTHER, in full dignity stands her ground; no ZOMBIE confronts her. When all the ZOMBIES have been sucked back into the cauldron, SAMUEL emerges from around the upstage-right end of the cauldron, in regal manner and royally attired. He slowly approaches SAUL, and addresses SAUL.)

SAMUEL: Your majesty, you should not be here. This is an unholy place.

SAUL: I say the same to you Samuel. You served both your King your Country and our almighty God Jehovah flawlessly. You have earned infinitely better than this, Samuel, a witch’s cauldron!

SAMUEL: Where I am, your majesty, all have the best of infinity because here there are no gods, no angels, nothing spiritual. From the moment I arrived here, I have thought about you joining me here, your majesty.

SAUL: It will be the greatest honour of my life, Samuel.

MOTHER: (Stepping forward anxiously.) “By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes. Open locks, whoever knocks.” (She points to the door that is upstage-left.) Jehovah approaches. He comes for you, your majesty.

SAMUEL: Instead, he will get me. All of you, leave.
(He points to the exit, downstage-left.)

SAUL: But I thought almighty Gods have no power in a place like this.

MOTHER: Your thinking is correct, your majesty.

SAUL: Then why would Jehovah-----?

MOTHER: Anger always makes one foolish, your majesty. Almighty Gods are not exempt from that almighty law of Nature. ( MOTHER and KING SAUL exit downstage- left, hurriedly, SAUL scooping up his cloak and hood on the way. The door upstage-left bursts open. JEHOVAH, almightily angry, enters. He looks around, searching. He sees SAMUEL. He does not recognize SAMUEL.)

SAMUEL: Jehovah, most almighty God, greetings.

JEHOVAH: Where’s the witch?

SAMUEL: Good Lord, do you remember me?

JEHOVAH: Oh, come now, I am millions of years old. So many have served me well. If I try I can remember all of them; but of what use? The universe is infinite; all life that comes into being lives forever, eventually, happily ever after. Now, for the last time, where is the witch that runs this place?

SAMUEL: This way, Lord. I was on my way to her. (He gestures towards the bubbling cauldron, as he steps to it. JEHOVAH, scornfully, steps towards him.

ZOMBIES jump out of the cauldron and attack JEHOVAH. SAMUEL smiles as he hastily exits upstage-right of the cauldron. JEHOVAH puts up an heroic fight against the ZOMBIES, but, having only mortal strength, is overpowered. They lift him up and toss him into the cauldron. They cheer as they jump in after him.

Blackout.