In the Bible: “One of the two malefactors which were crucified with Jesus, one on either side of him, said unto Jesus, ‘Lord, remember me when thou comest into thy kingdom.’ And Jesus said unto him, ‘Verily I say unto thee, this day shalt thou be with me in paradise.’ ”

Characters:-

-Malefactor 1. The one to whom Jesus replied.

-Malefactor 2.

-A colossal snake.
 
Plot: The two Malefactors find themselves in a pleasant wild forest.

(Daytime. A pleasant wild forest. Two escaped malefactor prisoners, in prison clothing, enter, furtively looking around. They look at each other, mystified. They talk in whispers.)

Malefactor 2: What?

Malefactor 1 : My dream?

Malefactor 2: What dream?

Malefactor 1: I told you when we were in prison I dreamt, more than once, I was talking to an Angel who said I would escape. You scoffed.

Malefactor 2: (Not in a whisper.) I scoffed because you had been talking to me, more than once, about escaping. Do I look like the Angel in your dreams?

Malefactor 1: It doesn’t matter! Scoff all you like! We have escaped! Look around us!

Malefactor 2: (Slowly looks around, and speaks in awe, softly.) We really have escaped?

Malefactor 1: Yes. So much for your scoffing, huh? Be thankful that you have been included in this escape. That ‘Angel in my dreams’ was the real deal.

Malefactor 2: Only if, when we learn where we have escaped to, is where we want to be. Huh?

Malefactor 1: The Angel said Paradise.

Malefactor 2: And just where is that?

Malefactor 1: Up to now, the only Paradise I knew of was what those priests spoke about to us when we were in prison. A place where there will be no need for us to steal anything because everything will be given to us free.

Malefactor 2: Okay. And when is the free giving to begin? I am hungry. I do not see anyone else around here. If there are animals. I hope they are all herbivores.

Malefactor 1: Ohhh, heck!

Malefactor 2: What?

Malefactor 1: Your “herbivores” remind me of what was those Bibles those priests gave us to read.

Malefactor 2: Herbivores makes you think of the Bible? That’s so weird. Could never happen to me
because I cannot read.

Malefactor 1: In the Bible there are no carnivores in God’s Paradise. All the animals are herbivores. Even the evil snakes eat fruit, only.

Malefactor 2: Your Angel sent us to where there are evil snakes? Obviously, a devil disguised as an Angel. We were better off in prison!

Malefactor 1: No, no. In the Bible, nobody gets bitten by snakes in God’s Paradise.

Malefactor 2: Good! Now let’s go find someone who will give us free food. I am starving.

Malefactor 1: (Mostly to himself, and covering some of his face with his hands.) Yikes!

Malefactor 2: (After glaring at Malefactor 1 in stern silence for a second-or-two.) Now what?

Malefactor 1: (Grimly, slowly.) I think there’s nobody else here.

Malefactor 2: What do you mean? What does the Bible say? Your Angel sent us to Paradise where there are no people? (Sarcastically.) Don’t tell me; let me guess: the people left Paradise because of the evil snakes!

Malefactor 1: (Weakly.) The Paradise the Bible speaks about happened thousands of year ago. The Bible says God Jehovah evicted all life from Paradise, and closed it down forever and put an Angel on guard to keep all living things out!

Malefactor 2: Thousands of years ago, you say?
(Malefactor 1 nods, slowly.) And locked down forever?

Malefactor 1: (Weakly. Softly.) That’s what the Bible says, man.

Malefactor 2: There you have it, then. This cannot be that first Paradise!

Malefactor 1: Then where is this? (In silence for a few seconds they look at each other; they look around.)

Malefactor 2: We could be dreaming.

Malefactor 1: Two of us having the same dream?

Malefactor 2: Why not? Just another miracle among others we are in already. Let us split up and explore in different directions.

Malefactor 1: Not a good idea. Alone, one or both of us could get lost. We do not know enough about what is happening around here.

Malefactor 2: Lost? In Paradise? Is it possible? Could even be desirable, I think.

Malefactor 1: Even so, I do not care to be the first one to be disappointed. Let’s stay together to help each other understand whatever happens here in this Paradise.

Malefactor 2: You think that Angel of your dreams will come to check up on you?

Malefactor 1: I would like that. However.

Malefactor 2: However what?

Malefactor 1: I sense that you were in that dream I had with ‘that Angel’, but I cannot remember the details about your presence.

Malefactor 2: So? The details of my presence don’t matter because here I am. Anyway, you said God closed down that first Paradise?

Malefactor 1: Yes, more than a thousand years ago. That’s what the Bible says.

Malefactor 2: That means nobody can get in, nowadays. And that has to mean where we are is not the Paradise God made. Could your Angel have meant another Paradise? The second one? The wrong one?

Malefactor 1: The only Angels I know about are those mentioned in the Bible. And in the Bible there is only one Paradise mentioned. And only one Angel is associated with it, and only after it was shut down.

Malefactor 2: You said when God closed down that first Paradise, he left an Angel on sentry guard?

Malefactor 1: Yes, it says so in the Bible.

Malefactor 2: It’s possible that is why that Angel of your dreams is not here is because that Angel is the one who has abandoned its post guarding that first Paradise, and that after it sent you on this wild goose chase, just for the heck of it, it returned to its sentry duty.

Malefactor 1: On the one hand, I can accept that entering this Paradise would be a serious desertion of its post. On the other hand, did it have to designate this place as Paradise, when, clearly, it, largely and obviously, is not?

Malefactor 2: Yeah! As far as I am concerned, this is not any kind of Paradise if we do not find a fruit tree in the next few minutes. I am hungry and thirsty!

Malefactor 1: I agree! Let’s head out and take charge of our destinies! To heck with Angels and Gods and Paradise! You choose a direction! Any direction!

Malefactor 2: Thank you. Whatever surprises are coming, happy or other, the happiest “bird-in-the-hand” surprise is that we are not in prison, anymore! And because of that, I gladly wish I never awake from this dream. Follow me! (They exit. The stage lights brighten on a colossal snake casually slithering along after them.)

 
                                                                                                                                               ~The End~