Oddly, the song that best depicts despair and grief the most, is a wonderfully listenable song, so very well performed and produced. It came out when I was at the peak of my life. It was 1979 and I was madly in love and engaged to be married in September of the following year. I was performing music often and I was the happiest I had ever been.

Randy VanWarmer came out with this beautiful song that featured one of my favorite, but obscure instruments, the autoharp. I understand John Sebastion plays one on this recording. I have seen Randy's name, even on his albums, spelled VanWarmer and Vanwarmer, and Van Warmer. I don't know which one is right, but I saw his autograph on one and he wrote Vanwarmer. The song is, Just When I Needed You Most. It is a powerhouse song delivered in a most gentle and soothing manner. His voice is unique and the music and chorus just wrap it all together in a smoothness that leaves no one unaffected. This is not just a song, it is a masterpiece.Really, stop. Take a little break. Watch Randy's performance and listen to the song on Facebook. Enjoy John's autoharp solo and Randy's gift to us all. 

It makes me weep every time I hear it, but I have to listen to it again and again. It is heartbreaking, but calming at the same time. This song personifies the way I feel every day since I lost my sweet wife Donna Sue, gone since Dec. 1, 2023. To make the aura even sadder, Randy died at the age of 48 from Leukemia, the same disease that killed Steve Goodman, another outstanding singer/songwriter in his forties.

 I listened to it on Youtube the other day, and was reading the "comments" section under the song, through my tears. All of them heartfelt feelings from surviving loved ones. Some are cryptic, others straight forward, but their messages are of the same genre, offering a surprising amount of comfort, knowing that there are so many others who feel like me and, some even worse. Many are of long lost loves, unforgotten, and sadly, quite a few unrequited. That has to be the worst.

Some lost loved ones to divorce. Although quite common, that would be awful. In other words, if you are in any kind of a pensive mood, this is the song for you.

But the song is so mesmerizing and such a great song with which to sing along that it is difficult to listen to it just once.

Randy was a folk singer in his twenties when he wrote his most famous tune. It hit No. 4 on the Billboard charts in 1979. He had a way with song titles, as he also wrote a tune called, Ain't Nothing Coming Down But the Rain. He wrote songs for Dolly Parton, the Oak Ridge Boys and others. He was a gentle soul, as depicted by his songs and a gentle voice, and tragically died at such a young age. Dolly made a cover of the song and it is pretty good, as she doesn't do anything halfway, but Randys' is better.

I admit being a softie when it comes to music. I always take songs to heart, researching many of them for the facts behind the song. There is one that I simply cannot get through without instantly weeping. This is an odd one. It is called Two Little Boys, a civil war song about two brothers joining the war, but on opposite sides. It culminates with one brother rescuing the other on the battlefield.

The verse that instantly produces tears goes:  Do you think I would leave you dying, when there's room on my horse for two? So climb up here Joe, we'll soon be flying to the ranks of the boys in blue. Can't you see Jack, I'm all a-tremble, it may be the flash and the noise, or maybe it's because I remember when we were two little boys.

Somewhere in there I am guaranteed to break down. I can never get to the last line because I am choking up, and I don't even have a brother. Go figure.  

But Just When I Needed You Most is among my favorite songs. I do not have A favorite, that would be impossible to say. I have many favorites. I have a category of Rock and Roll favorites, mostly oldies and a category of Folk favorites. Rock and Roll is not sequestered to raucous, rowdy songs, but also includes the more mellow songs of that era, like Poor Little Fool, Heart of Gold, In My Room, Oh, Julie, etc. Folk is mostly acoustic stuff of varied tempos.

I have recorded a library of about 1,500 or 1,600 songs, mostly from 1955 to 1975. Thanks to the vast repertoire of Youtube, I have found every song I ever wanted to record with the exception of two or three. That is because I don't know the names of the artists. I have gotten some pretty obscure stuff from Youtube and I don't know how they assembled such a comprehensive library of music.

One of my most interesting finds was a group called The Kelly Family. An intriguing montage of mostly nine family members who were huge in Europe in the 90's with some lively music and stage performances, especially around 1995 or '96. An interesting study with the kids being born all over the place.

Just When I Needed You Most. The specifics of the song may not strictly apply to your given situation, but the overall theme, "you are gone and I need you," can resonate with everyone. Your life will be enriched and it will be a pleasant listening and sing along experience. I recommend you listen to the song forthwith.

Ok, if you haven't done so yet--stop. Take a little break. Watch Randy's performance and listen to the song on Facebook.  And if you have already listened, do it again.