This
is a true story of fatherhood, regret, and redemption. As a young man
struggling to become the father I never had, I lost my daughter
Dakota to silence and misunderstanding. This chapter from my life
reflects both the cost of absence and the power of a father’s
intercession to redeem what was nearly lost. I offer it in hope that
it speaks to parents and children alike who are still reaching across
the wounds of time.
---
I
loved her first.
Before
the chaos. Before the court orders. Before the silence.
Dakota
was my first child. My first miracle. My first chance to be the
father I never knew. I remember her eyes—the way they locked
onto mine when I held her as a baby. I remember the way she fell
asleep on my chest, like my heartbeat was enough. I remember her
little hand gripping my thumb like she knew I would protect her from
the world.
But
life doesn’t always give us what we hope for. It gives us what
we’re ready to fight for.
And
back then, I didn’t know how to fight the right way.
---
Her
mother and I weren’t stable. We tried, but we were young,
broken, and often at war ourselves. And in the middle of it was
Dakota—watching, absorbing, forming her view of love and
fatherhood in the crossfire.
Then
came the separation. One day, I was Daddy. The next day, I was...
gone. Not because I didn’t care. Not because I walked away. But
because when relationships collapse, the children often fall through
the cracks.
For
years, I tried to stay connected. But phone calls became missed
connections. Visits became supervised meetings. Eventually, silence.
The
enemy didn’t just steal my presence—he tried to rewrite
my role. He whispered lies to her: “He left you.” “He
didn’t care.” “You weren’t enough.”
Lies with legs that walked right into her self-worth.
---
As
she got older, I watched from a distance as rebellion took root. Her
choices started reflecting the pain of abandonment. But I saw it for
what it was—grief. The grief of being adored and then
abandoned, even if that abandonment wasn’t my heart or
intention.
I
cried out to God. I warred in prayer. I laid on my face for a
daughter who no longer called me Daddy. And in those moments, I had
to face my own shame—the mistakes I made, the pride I carried,
the legal battles I lost because I didn’t know how to fight
with wisdom.
But
love is relentless. And a father’s love, rooted in God’s
love, never stops reaching.
---
There
came a moment when I had to stop asking for what I had lost and start
*declaring* what I would reclaim.
I
wrote letters. I sent gifts. I showed up to events even when she
didn’t acknowledge me. I started praying not just *for* Dakota,
but *with* heaven about who she was.
I
called her restored.
I
called her loved.
I
called her chosen—even when I felt like a stranger.
And
slowly, the walls began to fall.
---
One
day, she let me back in—not all the way, but just enough to
hear my heart again. And that was the beginning of healing. We
talked. We cried. We named the hurt. We forgave the silence. And I
told her what I had always wanted to say:
“
You
were the first one I loved without conditions. And I never stopped.”
Today,
Dakota is not just my daughter. She is my friend, my teacher, my
redemption song. Her journey isn’t perfect. Neither is mine.
But we’ve found our rhythm. And the Father—our heavenly
Father—has written mercy into every beat of it.
---
This
story isn’t just about a father and daughter. It’s about
how love, repentance, and persistence can rewrite a bloodline. I
offer it to any child who feels forgotten, and to every parent who
fears it’s too late.
It’s
not.
Derick
Blakes is a father, street prophet, and the founder of Confirmation
Nation Inc., a nonprofit focused on generational healing and
restoration. Based in California, he writes prophetic books and leads
Kingdom initiatives to rebuild families from the ground up. This is
his personal testimony and offering for those still believing for
family redemption.