The Lost Book Of Odysseus

Carrie Wilson

© Copyright 2004 by Carrie Wilson

Odysseus finds himself in great peril one day when he returns from a battle at the coliseum. Not from roaming Cyclops’s or a mean spirited god, but from his lady Penelope.  For poor Odysseus has received a love letter from his former mistress, Circe, asking him to return to her island, and Penelope finds it.

Penelope sits on a settee when her husband, Odysseus, returns.

Odysseus: Penelope, why do you sit here so poignant. Your eyes, green, clash with the redness of your face. Who or what has brought you this misery.

Penelope: This Odysseus, (she holds up the letter) this proposal. This has bought me into this state of misery you see me in now.

Odysseus takes the letter, skins over it, and grins.

Odysseus: Ah, from my friend Circe. Yes, I met her on the trip home, Penelope.

Penelope stands up in rage and grabs the letter.

Penelope: It reads, “Odysseus, my love. Please return to my arms, for I will please you like I have before!”

Odysseus: She did please me; she turned my men into pigs and then with my request transformed them back. I was pleased afterwards, that’s all she met my confused Penelope.

Penelope: Odysseus, why do you lie to me?

Odysseus: Are you accusing me of being insincere? I do not lie to you, why would you say such a thing.

Penelope: Fine Odysseus. You do not lie to me, but I need you to do me a simple favor. Swear it on Zeus.

Odysseus: I’m deeply sorry Penelope, I do not swear! A disgrace to the gods it will be, me swearing something as silly as a love letter on them.

Penelope: Odysseus, do you find me dim?

Odysseus: Penelope…

Penelope: I want the truth Odysseus!

Odysseus:  My Zeus! Penelope, my love, my suspicious love. You are one to question me like this! You win, Penelope. I did sleep with Circe. Being a man I could not help consenting!

Penelope: You didn’t have to agree,  but, “being a man” I guess is your excuse.

Odysseus: Penelope, this was no ordinary goddess. This was Circe, half witch. She could have turned me into a donkey!

Penelope: Do not fill my ears with such rubbish, Odysseus! If I were you I would I would ask one of my loyal servants to prepare me a bed downstairs.

Odysseus: Wait Penelope! If I were to mention that it wasn’t pleasant, neither enjoyable, and I only thought of you, would it make you feel any better.

Penelope: You only thought of me, Odysseus?

Odysseus: No, but I do think you should hold on to that feeling of content!

Penelope runs up the palace stairs as Odysseus shouts after her.

Odysseus- Would you have wanted me to return to you a donkey?

Odysseus yells aloud, and throws a glass at the wall. He looks at the door where he notices 2 servants watching.

Odysseus: Well, I trust that you were there long enough to here Penelope’s request. Why do you stand there, go make me my bed!

Scene 2
Odysseus is preparing for bed. He is sitting at the end of his temporary cot, when he hears a voice.

Voice: Odysseus….

Odysseus looks around fearful of what the voice was, but not wanting to look scared, goes back to what he was doing.

Voice: Odysseus, your wife looked very heated back there.

Odysseus: Why do you hide from me coward, show yourself!

Voice: I am no coward Odysseus,

A girl appears in the doorway

Girl: I am Erato, muse of lyrics. You can call me Era, however.

Odysseus: A daughter of Zeus? How do you know of me and my wife’s trouble?
Another voice answers

Voice: Zeus knows all, if you didn’t already know.

A girl appears next to Era.

Girl 2: Hello Odysseus. How are you? I am Thalia, muse of comedy.

Odysseus: Are there any more of you? Show yourselves.

Era: Actually there are 9 of us total. Only 3 of us were called upon to help you.

As Erato says this, another girl appears.

Girl 3-  Hello Odysseus, I am Polly, muse of music.

Odysseus: Why are you here?

Polly: Zeus asked for our help to assist you in repairing things with your wife, Penelope.

Thalia: Although, I wouldn’t mind sending you to the underworld for what you did.

Era: Thalia, behave. Anyway, he felt bad for your predicament. I believe he said that..

Thalia: Men will be men! What rubbish!

Erato: (agitated) Nevertheless, Zeus sent us down in his best interest. Think of us as a gift from the gods.

Odysseus: Well, my *assistants*, what do you propose I do, even though I could do this on my own if I very well pleased. Since, however, you are a gift from Zeus, I will let you help me.

Thalia is about to shout something but Polly stops her.

Erato:  You could go to the island of Britonious. That is where you will find the magic flower who grants wishes.

Odysseus: Genius!

Polly: It’s  400 miles away,  Odysseus.

Odysseus: That does not put a dent in my confidence, dear Polly.

Thalia: It is also guarded by Lesaiga, the monster who can kill you with a screech.
It has 5 legs, 4 arms, 6 tails, an enormous mouth, and  1 eye. Did that dent it?

Odysseus ignores Thalia’s comment

Odysseus:  How would I defeat Lesaiga?

Polly: You could borrow a pair of Hermes shoes and take the magic balloon from the island of Caltomembra.

Odysseus: Fine, Era, take your smart mouthed sister to the island of Caltomembra and get that balloon. Polly, you go get a pair of shoes from Hermes. I will call on my friend Eurylochus and we will snatch that flower.

Scene 3
Eurylochus and Odysseus are getting the boat ready to take off

Eurylochus: You know Odysseus, there are other ways you can get you wife back.

Odysseus: Yes, I know. They all, however, involve stunts that will take a lifetime to perform, or that will not work at all

Eurylochus: This is very risky though, Odysseus. That monster could kill us all. Then instead of spending a lifetime doing something to win back your wife, you’d spend a lifetime thinking about every single little thing you could have done to win back your wife.

Odysseus: Eurylochus, the first thing that you said when you opened your mouth is the only thing that I have floating in my conscious mind. Could you say it again for me?

Eurylochus: This is very risky?

Odysseus: Yes, that!

Eurylochus: Odysseus, do you not remember what happened maybe 4 years ago? Do you not remember why we had 13 of our best men go. Because of your “risky behaviors” and your stubbornness.

Odysseus: Those men were destined to die. Now Eurylochus, I do not want to here another word about it, or I will take it as my best interest to throw your severed head to the depths of Poseidon’s mouth.

Eurylochus: You know Odysseus; you say that like being slowly killed in your care is better.

Odysseus: What do you mean by that Eurylochus?

Eurylochus: I mean that I am better of dead with my head handed to rabid WOLVES than staying here with you, where I am slowly but surely dieing.
Odysseus: Then go die away from me, Eurylochus. Go slit your wrists in the lake, but be sure to leave the world a letter saying how you were, “better off”.

Eurylochus yells a yell so loud that even Odysseus thinks that the gods hear it,  He then paces back and forth for a second but stops to look Odysseus very coldly in the face.

Eurylochus: If anyone even gets a slight scratch on them during this Odysseus, I’m leaving. I’m leaving and taking what’s left of the girls with me, if in fact it is one of the girls. When I leave you will never see me again Odysseus, because I am through with you and your wasted boldness. If, nevertheless, you do wish to find me, look for the nearest red lake.

Odysseus: Deal my astonishing Eurylochus,

As he says this the girls come from the sky carrying all the items: Hermes shoes, and the magic balloon.

Era: This is it, Odysseus. All the items I suspect you will need for our trip.

Thalia: I brought a generous amount of beeswax just in case it takes Odysseus a moment or two to make it to the top.

Odysseus: Thank you three, now let us set sail.

After an horrendously long boat ride and a significant amount of bickering between Thalia and Odysseus, they make it to Britonious.  Eurylochus is the first to speak.

Eurylochus: What an awful ride. I was willing to bet that Thalia was going to get thrown of the boat if it had lasted another minute or so.

Thalia: He wouldn’t dare touch a daughter of Zeus!

Odysseus: I think my lord Zeus would have understood.

Erato: Would you two hush, listen!

When someone yells bad news, such as “fire in the coliseum” there is always an awkward silence in the place of the news, right before everyone starts panicking,
Such describes the silence in the group when Erato tells them to listen, for at that moment they here a grumble. They then here large foot steps coming towards them and Thalia screams. Erato puts a finger over her mouth, telling Thalia to be quiet.  Polly is the second to scream and Eurylochus grabs her and puts his hand over her mouth.

Erato: (whisper) don’t make ANY sudden movements.

As she says this a beast appears in the trees.  Lesaiga meets Thalia’s description to a tee. Odysseus looks up and can see her roaming eye looking at all of them.  Odysseus realizes that she already sees them and speaks in a soft whisper, not knowing why, just feeling safer for doing so

Odysseus: Thalia, hand around the beeswax.

Thalia, shivering, takes the beeswax from her bag and starts handing it to everyone.

Odysseus looks up once more and gasps, startling the others,

Odysseus: Hurry and shove it in your ears, but don’t look up. Whatever you do, don’t look up!

They hurry and put the beeswax in there ears, but Erato is all but too curious. She looks up and sees the monster sucking in as much breath as she can. She looks back down and turns to Odysseus who knows she looked. Teary eyed, she mouths a sorry to Odysseus and screams and runs away. Thalia and Polly, seeing Erato go, look up to and immediately scream.

Odysseus: Stay here or you’ll provoke her. Eurylochus go get Erato. It’s only a matter of time before she…

The second he says “she” a loud scream erupts from Lesaiga like a volcano. The girls kneel down before the beast in pain, for the beeswax isn’t that strong. Eurylochus is standing with Erato covering her ears with his hands as she screams.

Thalia: Odysseus, get yourself up there before my eardrums shatter.

Odysseus can  make out what she says and flies up with Hermes shoes. As he gets closer, the screaming gets worse and worse. He finally passes out and falls to the ground as he reaches her head.
Apollo appears out of nowhere and catches Odysseus just before he hits the ground.

He sets him on the ground and runs to the aid of the 3 girls. He rounds them up and yells at them

Apollo: Your father had no right to send you three down here with such danger afoot.

Thalia: Apollo, you should be dead.

Apollo:  Save your breath Thalia, I can’t hear you.

He turns his head so that they all can see the beeswax he has tightly packed in his ears. He has allot more than them so he can’t here the beast in the least bit.  Apollo spots Eurylochus and he runs up to him.

Apollo: You idiot! Did you honestly think that you could make it up to her mouth with that little bit of beeswax you set in his ears. I swear, mortals, they live as if they are to live forever!

Eurylochus looks confused and Apollo realizes that he has beeswax in his ears.

Eurylochus: What is that dear god Apollo?

Apollo doesn’t here him either so he just yells out loud. He looks up and sees that the monster is just about out of breath. He watches her mouth closely until he’s sure she’s stopped. He wakes up Odysseus, rounds up all the men and girls, and signals them to take the beeswax out there ears.

Apollo: Now listen to me. The only way you’ll make it up there is if you send her to sleep. Once asleep, you are free to fly up and put that balloon on her mouth. Be forewarned that as soon as the balloon hits her lips, she has the potential to wake up.  Since she is a very big monster and this is not at all that much of a powerful spell, she could very much wake up just in time to poke her head snatch you up with those massive teeth.

Apollo starts chanting a spell as Odysseus prepares to take off and the rest put the beeswax back in there ears. Lesaiga screams again but not as loud for she is falling asleep, Eurylochus compares it in his mind like a loud yawn as she continues. She finally shuts her mouth and closes her eyes.

Odysseus gives the rest a nod as he starts to float up. He finally makes it to her mouth and makes a mental note to ask Apollo why she sleeps standing up. He takes out the balloon and notices a written “charlatan” across the front. He looks down at Thalia who he suspects the task was of getting the balloon. She gives him a sarcastic smile and Odysseus shakes his head and continues. He wraps the balloon around one side of her mouth and is relieved that she doesn’t wake up. He flies to the other side of her face and puts the other side around her mouth. This time he isn’t as luck however for the monster wakes up hastily and grabs Odysseus with one of her hands. Lesaiga starts sucking in breath as Apollo flies up to the aid of Odysseus. He pulls at her hand but her grip is too strong. He sees that the monster is almost done sucking in air and he gives Odysseus a gloomy look. Odysseus trembles and gives Apollo a brave nod. HE kicks of his shoes which falls at Eurylochus’ feet.  Apollo flies back down.

Odysseus: Eurylochus, I shall keep my end of the bargain. Leave or you all will die for sure. Tell my wife that I did love her and that she should not feel bad. This is my fault, for if it wasn’t my (he looks at Eurylochus sincerely) risks and stubbornness, I would be with her as we speak. I love you Eurylochus, you were my comrade my friend. Thank you for the aid Era, Polly, Apollo. Thalia, I guess you did get your wish. I’ll see you in death valley.

Odysseus nodded at all of them and then closed his eyes

Apollo: Put the shoes on Eurylochus. Thalia, you grab Eurylochus’ arm and Polly and Era you grab mine. Hurry that balloon could start filling at any moment.

As they leave Apollo glances back at Odysseus who has his eyes tightly shut. Finally, Lesaiga starts her screaming but it comes out as a muffled shriek. Apollo makes a rose appear from his hand and he throws it down at Odysseus.

They fly about 20 miles away from Britonious and Thalia requests to look back.  They turn back and as they see a giant balloon, bigger than Lesaiga, still growing. Odysseus looks like an ant in her palm. They continue flying and as they do they hear a loud pop, a faint scream and the sound of a beast falling.

Era covers her mouth and Polly starts crying. Eurylochus gives Apollo a shaken look and Thalia looks on.

Thalia: See you in death valley…

Hi, My name is Carrie, but call me Reece or Era. I live in a full family of six at the moment. 1 brother, 1 sister, 1 cousin, and both my parents. I love books by Anne Rice, Clea Hantman, and many other authors. I usually read, write, or watch T.V. like That 70’s Show, Lizzy Maguire, and Boy Meets World. I’ve been told I am a great writer for my age and that motivates me a lot.

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