Looking at the LakeAlexander Phillips © Copyright 2021 by Alexander Phillips |
Photo by Tatiana Rodriguez on Unsplash |
That
deeper sense of dread ruled her life. Shannon wasn’t good at
reading faces, and her
determination
to leave conversations once they started was fierce. Shannon and Mary
were not friends,
Shannon didn’t consider them friends. It seemed Mary did
though, every conversation starting
with Mary’s classic “Hello, why, isn’t it just
dandy out?” Even when it wasn’t dandy out, it
felt
as if Mary only saved this phrase for Shannon.
Shannon
Albrey wasn’t taken to the socialization she was destined to
do. Mary Farrow was, and they
were
forcibly joined at the hip, being the only girls the same age for
miles around. It was June, the year
was 1908. The day had started already unlike most days, Mary Farrow
was early to their mid-afternoon
walk.
Mrs.
Albrey had scheduled the walk around midday to help Shannon gain some
extra glow; she hated
how
her daughter stayed inside the house. Mary Farrow loved the midday
walk to show off her new skirts,
which were made of old skirts, but fashioned into something
extraordinary. Daniel Lewis described
it that way, he said Mary’s whole life was fashioned into
something extraordinary. She was beautiful,
she was perfectly sophisticated and fitted like a gear to their
area's social life.
Mary
came at 11:32 AM. She was usually dead on arrival by 1:00 PM.
“Shannon! Oh, I’m most early
today,
I know that, but I decided to take us on another route than usual,
not just round the park.” Shannon
only nodded in response. “It seems that you don’t like
the park?”
“It’s
not my usual haunt.”
“Ghastly
to use that phrase, ‘haunt’ for a place you locate
frequently,” Mary tsked and waved her
parasol
in Shannon’s face to show her displeasure, and Shannon quickly
stopped, her face seized up, and
she quickly let go, face back to neutrality. Mary quirked her brows.
“Oh Shannon, your face! It’s much
better to use ‘purlieu’.”
“I
think it conveys what I need it to just well,” Shannon replied
stoically. She used her parasol as a
cane,
occasionally whacking at some piece of bush. “I needn’t
use all the words you use Mary, I’d seem
unoriginal.”
The
two girls walked their usual track until they came across the
crosspath that separated the open
field
of the park and the more narrow continuing track to the inner parts
of the woods. Shannon had suggested
walking down it once, Mary had shut it down immediately. Shannon had
no idea why, Mary
never explained.
“I
picked this way because it gives us a chance to really talk, I’ve
realized that after 5 years of us
knowing
one another, we have never really talked.”
“I’ve
never wanted to know you Mary,” Shannon sharply said. Mary’s
gaze froze over, her smart smile
dipping. “I have made that clear about a thousand times.”
“We
should keep going.” Mary quickly strode on. Her pacing left
Shannon breathless most days.
The
path was only woods, and led to only more trees with the dirt path
only getting thinner and
thinner.
Shannon had to walk behind Mary now, and Shannon felt that sense of
dread she usually shoved
in her gut.
“Mary,
I don’t appreciate--” Shannon pleaded.
“What
don’t you appreciate, Shannon?” Mary turned suddenly.
“This isolation? You know you love it, I know do, you do at home,” Mary stepped up close, her nose brushing
Shannon’s face. “There’s a lake here.”
They
stomped along to the lake, the ground becoming more soft with each
step. Shannon looked
down
briefly, and saw how her hem was now covered in mud. She would’ve
lifted her skirts, but she didn’t
want to catch her sleeves in the brambles of the trees. “I feel
as if we should stop.”
“We
are.” Mary froze, her body separating Shannon from the opening
of the trees that showcased a
lake.
“The lake. We couldn’t come here before because boys like
to jump into it, naked.”
Shannon
had no idea what to say to that. “Alright.” Then she had
one. “Why are we coming now?”
Mary
walked right to the edge of the lake. She dropped her parasol and
started undoing the buttons
on
the front of her blouse. She ripped it off in a rush, and dropped it
on the ground. It was bright white
and lacy, Shannon gasped. Mary undid her belt, everything until she
was just in her chemise, corset,
and garters. Shannon never knew how waifish she was. Extremely pale,
her blue veins poked through
her skin along her forearms. Shannon felt ill, something black and
swelling corroding her stomach.
Mary removed her hat, and only took one long pin out her hair.
Instead of just dropping it to
the ground like everything else, she stuck it in the dirt, so it
jutted upright into the air.
“Shannon
Albrey, I’m killing myself.” Mary said it all very
definitively. Similar to when she was
talking
about Adam Reeley’s new beau or Jasmine Richter’s cousin
that was staying in town for the week.
All very sensible, stately, and whispered.
“Why?”
Shannon asked, her voice sounded thin and warbled, but still steely.
What was Mary getting
at?
She lacked all sense, Shannon knew this. She, Mary, hadn’t the
air of melancholy whatsoever.
“Not
a single soul likes me, truly likes me,” Mary coughed. “You
were supposed to like me, girls our
age
usually like one another. You hate me. I can’t bear you hating
me, I can’t bear the dislike I have for
you.”
“Oh,
Mary, how could I not! What are you saying? Oh God, we ought to be in
the park by now playing your
stupid card games!” Shannon started crying. She threw down her
parasol and put her fisted hand
onto her chest. Breathing. She was still doing it.
Mary
huffed, and walked up to Shannon with as much fury her small frame
could hold. She raised
her
palm and slapped Shannon as hard as possible. Shannon retaliated with
a slap back, and the girls were
soon wrestling.
They
soon reached the shallow edge of the lake, and as Shannon’s
skirts got wetter, her legs felt like
lead
weights. Mary wasn’t strong, but she was relentless in the
barrage of fists she was throwing. Shannon
pried her hands from Mary’s hair and went for her neck, which
left her open to a hard blow to
her cheek. Once she wrapped her hands around it, she squeezed. Mary
seized up and went to pull her
hands away, but Shannon kept her grip— her legs had fallen
still. Black blurring her vision in exhaustion.
The
two girls fell in a tired heap. Shannon’s head went underwater
for a few seconds, and she felt like
keeping
it there, until she found she couldn’t breathe and yanked
herself back to the surface.
“I’ll
end you, Miss Farrow,” Shannon gasped. “Goodness sake,
I’ll end you.”
“Shut
up! Shut up, your pretentiousness is a killer!” Mary screamed
hoarsely. She grabbed Shannon’s
face.
“You never talk, you have never held a conversation with me,
don’t start now or by God I will stone
you—” Mary held a small rock in her other hand. “I’ll
break your head open.”
“Stop
telling me what to do, or what I do,” Shannon whispered. She
rolled out from beneath Mary and
grabbed her parasol. “Go ahead and end your life.”
“I
can’t now, you’ve ruined my peace.”
“I
was bound to end your peace Mary Farrow, I haven’t the
slightest clue why you asked me to be
here.”
“I
thought you’d be more sympathetic, I was wrong.”
“Yes.”
Shannon stepped back onto the pathway, leaving Mary Farrow behind.
Shortly though,
extremely
shortly, she soon heard soggy steps that could’ve only belonged
to Mary, and she quickened
her step.
“Stop,”
Mary Farrow’s voice was low. “We’re going to go to
the park.”
“Like
this? I’m soaked, you’re covered in mud—”
“Shannon,
you’ve never given a damn before. I don’t give a damn
anymore.” Shannon’s jaw dropped.
Mary
never used such vulgar language, Shannon did, in order to get the
same response from Mary. “I know
you, don’t you want to see their faces once? In our condition?
The questions they would have? You
would love that. I always hated you for it.”
“I—”
Shannon stilled. “Wouldn’t you hate it? Those exact
questions? You’ve told me that you’d hate
to
be the center of any sort of drama.” Shannon’s face
tightened. Shannon Albrey hated Mary Farrow for
a singular reason, she never seemed to have trouble navigating it
all. Shannon didn’t want Mary to
join her in her self-relegated social ostracism. “I don’t
need you and me to be completely bound in any
way.”
Mary
gripped Shannon’s hand hard enough to hurt. “I want to
be, I want to be bound in this one way.
Truly.”
Shannon
and Mary held their gaze. Mary was the first to look down. “Please.”
Revulsion
twisted in Shannon’s gut. “Fine.”
The
pair walked side by side, the brambles ripping holes in their
sleeves. Shannon’s hair was falling
out
of its do, and she felt like crying again.
When
they reached the park, it was 1:00 PM, and the sun burned into their
faces. Daniel Lewis saw
them
in the clearing first, and ran over. “Oh, Good God! You girls
are a mess, what happened?” Shannon
and Mary were about to answer simultaneously, but Daniel found the
answer. “Oh, these thorns,”
he picked one off Mary’s shoulders. “You went by the
lake, didn’t you? Don’t go back there, alright?
Boys go back there, and do the most darndest things.”