2004 by Lois Armstrong
Thank you for coming Father, you see it is important for me to talk to someone and I am so glad you took the time to come. Please set down and have a drink. No? Coffee? I have some made. I better start at the begainning. My folks was everyday people like most people. They worked hard to riase me and my brother's. Actually my brother's and I was not that close. I mean we played ball and stuff you know like most kids do but when it came right down to it, we each had our own ideas but there was nothing wrong with that.
Don went on to be a Priest. John went into the garage business and me I stayed home until I was twenty, went to work in a Deli where I met Meg. She was so lovely, when she walked into the room the whole place light up. Her eyes was like nothing I ever seen. Her laughter was like bells. I married her and we was happy then came Tom.
I was thrilled on having a boy, I guess most men are, but with me he was an angel then they came and told me that Meg had bleed out. My mother took the baby and I took to the bottle, She died when he was six and I had to take him. Everytime I looked into those eyes I could see Meg, but more then that I could see her grave and the child I love, I loved I grew to hate.
I took my belt off to him everytime he looked at me wrong, I knew he hated me. How could he not help it. When I got home from work, I start drinking and before the night was over he would get a beating, amd sent to bed with no supper. Then one day he brought Buddy home.
He was a German shepherd, about two years old, Tom promptly named Buddy. I told him to get the mute out or I would shoot him. That dog just stared at me with those eyes. I never seen a dog with black eyes before, but these was coal bloack and full of hate.
I get my belt and that animal would stand between me and Tom. He didn't show his teeth or snarl nothing like that, just looked at me. That morning when Tom left for school I got my rifle out and shot that mute and buried him in the back yard. When Tom came home I said the mute ran away and go buy to him but Tom knew I lied.
He howls at night. Buddy does. I can hear him calling me in his howl. He says my name. I went out to find him with my rifle but I couldn't. You see he was in his grave in the back yard but he howls every night. Tom left one day and never came back. I heard he move to Townson, found himself a wife. He has a couple of boys and a dog. They do very well for what I am told.
You see Father, you are looking at a tired man. Buddy calls to me everynight. It has been over ten years now. That's a long time. There has been very little sleep. Can't drink enough to shut him out. He just stands out there howling the night away. Hate has a strange way of coming back on you. I only hope that Meg can forgive me. That's important you know. The thought of her hating me is agonizing.
I see it is getting dark now, maybe you should go. I thank you for coming, it feels good to get this all out. I have to go soon it will be finish. I just hope it won't hurt to bad.
The walls are listening.
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Lois Armstrong's Storylist And Biography